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poster of Ned's Declassified School Survival Guide
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Ned's Declassified School Survival Guide (2004)

The whacky adventures of Ned Bigby and his best pals Moze and Cookie at James K. Polk Middle School, as "every-kid" Ned shatters the fourth wall to share tips and tricks on navigating middle school or junior high hurdles. Ned's not super cool, and he has no superpowers. He is, however, witty, well-groomed, upbeat and self-aware. Moreover, with more than a little help from his two best friends, he's equipped to conquer middle school minefields. From crushing bullies to crushes, from off- the-wall, mean and cool teachers to pop quizzes, elections and detentions, Ned knows that nothing, including the seventh grade, is as bad as it seems, and friendship matters most.

Release Date: Tue, Sep 07, 2004

Country: US
Language: En | Fr
Runtime: 24

Lindsey Shaw
Jennifer Ann 'Moze' Mosely
Daniel Curtis Lee
Simon "Cookie" Nelson-Cook
Christian Serratos
Suzie Crabgrass
Rob Pinkston
Coconut Head
Tylor Chase
Martin Qwerly
Hamilton Mitchell
Vice Principal Crubbs
Kyle Swann
Billy Loomer
Carlie Casey
Missy Meany
Alex Black
Seth Powers
Don Creech
Mr. Sweeney
Austin Butler
Zippy Brewster

Season 3:

Guide to: New Grade & Dodgeball
Episode 1: Guide to: New Grade & Dodgeball (Sep 24, 2006)
New Grade: Ned accidentally becomes the new class bully, while Moze deals with a not-so-friendly new English Teacher. Cookie tries to get to know the new no-braces, non-sniffling Lisa Zemo.

Dodgeball: Ned must battle the dark side, Loomer and his ‘secret weapon’ in a dodgeball game, and he must do it without Moze, the best player in school!

Guide to: Reading & Principals
Episode 2: Guide to: Reading & Principals (Oct 01, 2006)
Reading: Ned tries ways to avoid his reading assignments, and Moze starts a girls-only book club that Cookie desperately wants to be in it. Principals: Principal Pal is retiring. It’s up to Ned, Moze and Cookie to find a new replacement, or VP Crubbs will get the job.
Guide to: Popularity & Stressin' Out
Episode 3: Guide to: Popularity & Stressin' Out (Oct 15, 2006)
A new popularity list is posted – Missy "helps" Ned become popular so that he can ask Suzie out; Moze is in the top 10, but she does not like being popular; Cookie tries to find the list maker so that he can be made more popular. Ned becomes stressed that Suzie has another boyfriend; Moze becomes stressed that she will end up like iTeacher; Cookie competes with his rival Evelyn Kwong for the best test grade.
Guide to: Dismissal & The School Play
Episode 4: Guide to: Dismissal & The School Play (Oct 22, 2006)
Ned, Moze and Cookie must make it to the bus on time; Suzie moves into Ned's locker, which messes with his dismissal routine; Moze and all the other girls are forced to wait to use the bathroom; Cookie accidentally kisses Evelyn Kwong and must avoid her. The school puts on a production of Romeo and Juliet; Ned is determined to stop Spencer, who is playing Romeo, from kissing Suzie, who is playing Juliet; Moze, the stage manager, is determined to stop Ned and keep the play on track; Cookie helps Ned so that he can get the role of Romeo.
Guide to: Halloween & Vampires, Ghosts, Werewolves and Zombies
Episode 5: Guide to: Halloween & Vampires, Ghosts, Werewolves and Zombies (Oct 29, 2006)
The kids set up a Halloween party at Polk, and Principal Pal is thought to be dead after he enters the haunted hall. Polk becomes a Halloween nightmare, where Ned is a vampire, Cookie is a werewolf, Moze is a ghost, and Gordy is a zombie.
Guide to: Art Class & Lost and Found
Episode 6: Guide to: Art Class & Lost and Found (Nov 05, 2006)
Ned draws an abstract piece of art, which everyone else sees as a 'naked lady', leading to a cause célèbre; Moze tries photography and creates photos of other people's personal moments; Cookie gets 6th graders to make him keybowls. Ned finds a pair of Carmelo Anthony signed sneakers that he wants to claim, but Moze tries to find the shoes' real owner; Moze tries to find her stuffed animal that she lost in sixth grade; Cookie tries to find his MP3 player which has an embarrassing song he recorded on it.
Guide to: Social Studies & Embarrassment
Episode 7: Guide to: Social Studies & Embarrassment (Nov 12, 2006)
Ned becomes project partners with Moze, who becomes jealous when he begins spending too much time with Suzie; Cookie is stuck with Evelyn Kwong as a social studies partner. Ned is subject to forms of embarrassment such as tooting, burping, and the water fountain squirting on his pants; Moze tries to talk to a foreign student, Faymen, but ends up embarrassing herself; Cookie constantly gets pantsed.
Guide to: The Bus & Bad Hair Days
Episode 8: Guide to: The Bus & Bad Hair Days (Nov 26, 2006)
Ned tries to get to school early so he can get rid of a note he wrote to Suzie that says "I love you", but the bus driver is distressed over his own recent break-up; Moze tries to get a seat next to Faymen on the bus; Cookie must try to get to school after he misses the bus, or rather, the bus misses him. Ned tries to break out of school to get a free haircut; Moze tries to please Faymen with her hair, and ultimately seeks out Missy's help; Cookie tries to get Lisa Zemo to notice his mustache hair.
Guide to: Revenge & School Records
Episode 9: Guide to: Revenge & School Records (Jan 15, 2007)
Revenge: When Ned gets revenge on Loomer, Martin notices and gives him names like "The Revenger." All the kids start to ask him to get revenge for them. A girl named Stacey wants revenge on Moze and the Wolf volleyball team. School Records: Ned wants to beat the hallway speed record, he runs into Crubbs. Crubbs marks Ned's permanent record. Cookie loses his perfect attendance award. Moze tries to beat the school record for the most school records in sport.
Guide to: Volunteering & The Library
Episode 10: Guide to: Volunteering & The Library (Jan 27, 2007)
Hallway: Ned becomes Hall Monitor, Moze tries to spend time with Faymen and Cookie creates a Hallway Traffic Report. Friends Moving: Ned and Moze find out Faymen is moving away and help him stay and Cookie lies to everyone that he's moving away.
Guide to: Hallways & Friends Moving
Episode 11: Guide to: Hallways & Friends Moving (Feb 03, 2007)
Boys: Ned goes through a phase when Suzie moves away. The guys try and get him back to normal, so he can continue his guide. Meanwhile, Moze starts a class to help girls with understanding guys. Girls: Ned has a hard time writing more tips when he realizes he has no tips about girls. So he asks Moze to take over for some tips. Cookie dresses up as a girl to find out what Liza Zemo likes in a guy.
Guide to: Boys & Girls
Episode 12: Guide to: Boys & Girls (Feb 10, 2007)
Cellphones: Suzie and Ned try to keep their long-distance relationship, by talking in between classes. Moze gets a new phone she has no clue how to use. Cookie wears a jacket covered in 33 cellphones in attempt to win a Mustang Convertible from a local radio station.Woodshop: Ned and Cookie blow up the art room, and have to switch to woodshop. Moze is entering a woodshop competition. Ned keeps overhearing Moze and thinks she is talking about her feelings for him. Cookie is on the run from a killer saw named "Christine".
Guide to: Cell Phones & Woodshop
Episode 13: Guide to: Cell Phones & Woodshop (Feb 17, 2007)
Episode Summary Coming Soon...
Guide to: Getting Organized & Extra Credit
Episode 14: Guide to: Getting Organized & Extra Credit (Feb 24, 2007)
Getting Organized: Ned's locker is a mess, and his brain is too! With the help of Mr. Sweeney, he needs to get organized. Moze and Cookie's favorite snack has been replaced by Powdered Mini Donuts in the vending machine, and they need to work together to get their favorite snack back.Extra Credit: Ned needs to get at least a B- or his mom will get really mad at him. Unfortunately, his average is a C+ in all classes. When asking his teachers how to bump his grade up, they all say the same thing: Extra Credit. Now he needs to complete four Extra Credit Assignments in just a few days. Meanwhile,Moze wants her mark bumped up to an A+, so she designs a very large Volcano and Cookie gets a Credit card that is to be used for emergencies, but he uses it for general purposes.
Guide to: Fundraising and Competition
Episode 15: Guide to: Fundraising and Competition (Mar 10, 2007)
Ned and Cookie must raise money in different ways after they eat all of the chocolate they were supposed to sell for school fundraising; Moze cannot seem to sell her last chocolate bar. Ned teams up with Missy to battle Loomer in a Social Studies competition; Moze must find a new rival now that Suzie has moved away; Cookie fakes his way to become Lisa's salsa dance partner for a dance competition.
Guide to:Making New Friends & Positives & Negatives
Episode 16: Guide to:Making New Friends & Positives & Negatives (Mar 24, 2007)
MAKING NEW FRIENDS; Ned tries to be friends with Faymen, Moze wants a friend to go shopping with and Cookie befriends the Weasel. POSITIVES & NEGATIVES; Ned tries to cheer up the most negative kid in school, Moze finds out Faymen's kisses lack spark and Cookie tries to zap Loomer with static electricity
Guide to: Money & Parties
Episode 17: Guide to: Money & Parties (Apr 07, 2007)
The trio need to raise money for a music festival; Ned borrows money from Missy that he must work off to pay her back; Moze gets her money from hard work; Cookie tries to get money from entertainment. Ned goes to Seth's party with Missy and tries to ditch her when Suzie unexpectedly shows up; Moze tries to kiss Ned to determine if she'll see sparks; Cookie is not invited, so he sneaks in as the girl named Simone.
Guide to: Spring Fever & School Newspaper
Episode 18: Guide to: Spring Fever & School Newspaper (May 05, 2007)
Guide to: Spring Fever and School Newspaper is an episode of the Nickelodeon television series Ned's Declassified School Survival Guide.
Guide to: Health & Jealousy
Episode 19: Guide to: Health & Jealousy (May 12, 2007)
Ned suffers from an embarrassing itch; Moze tries to clean up the resuscitation dummy, but she throws it out the window and buries it, and Cookie thinks that it was Faymen; Cookie also is suffering from mood swings. Ned and Moze pretend to date to free Ned from Missy's jealous rage; Seth, Faymen and Loomer fight over Moze; Cookie attempts to make Lisa Zemo jealous by pretending to go out with another girl, but instead, it makes Evelyn Kwong jealous.
Guide to: Tests and When You Like Someone Who Is Going Out With Someone Else
Episode 20: Guide to: Tests and When You Like Someone Who Is Going Out With Someone Else (Jun 02, 2007)
Ned studies for three tests on the same day with the help of the school's geeks and becomes a geek himself in the process; Moze takes a test to see if Ned or Faymen is right for her and Faymen gets all perfect scores and Ned as a geek gets all zeroes; Cookie gives Evelyn Kwong a "test" to prove that they are incompatible and she decides to date Seth instead. Ned tries to confess to Moze that he likes her; Moze must decide between Ned and Faymen, while Faymen has a decide whether or not to go back to Brazil; Cookie eliminates all of Lisa Zemo's other admirers so that he can spend time with her; in a surprise ending reveal, Suzie has moved back to Polk.
Guide to: Field Trips, Permission Slips, Signs and Weasels
Episode 21: Guide to: Field Trips, Permission Slips, Signs and Weasels (Jun 08, 2007)
The school goes on a field trip to a museum, including Ned, Moze and Cookie, even after they have been banned from the field trip by Vice-Principal Crubbs for trying to forge a permission slip for Cookie. Ned tries to spend time with Suzie while avoiding Crubbs; Moze tries to see the wild boy, and Loomer tries to spend time with her. Cookie becomes "the Steel Eagle" to impress Lisa Zemo. Eventually, all three are chased by Crubbs, museum security guards, and samurai actors. Ned then becomes the museum's titular Wild Boy and must choose between Suzie and Moze. He chooses Moze, they kiss, and become boyfriend and girlfriend, while Suzie decides to date Loomer again. Cookie learns of a plan to steal the museum's Wild Boy painting, so the trio gain the attention of the security guards and catch the thieves. Cookie wins a date with Lisa. Meanwhile, back at the school, Gordy tries to catch the weasel with the help of the other teachers, whose items have been destroyed by the weasel. They eventually demolish the entire school to catch the weasel, only to find out that it has given birth; feeling sympathetic, Gordy and the teachers decide to spare the weasel. Note: This is a double-length episode.

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